It was a noon flight and Mr. LT was taking me to the airport so dropping me off at 8am sounded about right, right? Sigh. No problem, coffee and a snack and my book and, while cursing my daughter, a little Candy Crush. That is a story by itself.
Now I am one of those people who doesn’t want to visit with you while flying. I don’t want to hear about your family or where you’re going, came from, and graduated college, how many grandkids you have or what you ate for breakfast. Mr. LT and I don’t even sit next to each other sometimes, he takes the window and I the aisle much to the consternation of the person in the middle.
I approach my seat…there is a gentleman in the aisle seat I have the window. He is reading his book with his $300 Bose headphones on, score.
M: Excuse me thanks.
Mr. B: Sure.
M: (Sitting getting adjusted making the international sign of 'don’t bother me I am not here to talk or socialize' by getting out my book, water, snack, headphones and magazine for the pre-reading phase since I can’t have my e-book on. This takes care of any early stealth conversation strike. I have now created my 'privacy zone'.) (Magazine in hand and go.)
Mr. B: So that was some mess, I hate changing terminals and a broken plane? (Another story)
M: (?) (Um yeaaaaaah…mentally waving my hands indicating the international sign for ‘I am not visiting with you’) Um, oh I know.
Mr. B: I wonder what the problem was I came in on that flight.
M: (?) (Why is he wearing those headphones?) Wow, yea.
Now you might think me insensitive, but keep in mind I have been up since 4:30am and I have a tendency to fall asleep during flights even during conversations. I kid you not! So it is very tedious for me to try and maintain small talk especially with someone I don’t know.
The migraine medicine I took would kick in eventually and then you can just forget about it.
M: (Head back down to magazine. He is reading my magazine…who does that? He has a book. I am mentally waving my hands indicating the international sign for ‘you are invading my 'private zone'’ just short of actually making the hand gestures outlining your space-my space!).
We take off and it’s a good reason to close my eyes and put my head back. Mr. B. decides to take a nap. But what’s this, his legs splay open and knees everywhere including all over me.
Oh a true violation of all international rules! (Hello! Did you all just see that!?) That just is not allowed! Of course I counter with the, ‘I am re-adjusting my seat’ move which knocks his knee back to his side and wakes him. He becomes aware that he may have invaded my zone and re-positions. Exactly! (mental fist bump).
Flying is so very exhausting.